If I have one more pseudo salesperson ask me: "Are you right?" I will contemplate resigning myself to the fact that people are more happy playing and being dumb than wanting to show both intelligence and initiative.
Case in point...I like coffee and visit lots of cafes. The logic suggest that most people who go to a cafe are wanting something to eat or drink..fair expectation I would have thought.
I also figure most of these establishments want to make money so the right question a waiter should ask could be "What would you like to order?" or "May I take your order?" anything other than; "Are you right?...What does that even mean?
The intelligent thinking professional will also ask if a patron who orders cake or a slice..."Would you like a coffee with that?" and through the power of subtle positive suggestion will more than likely get an order for a beverage as well.
So please ask me "How may I help you?" or "Are you looking for something specific?" if I look lost and never "Are you right?" because that is an insult to your intelligence first and foremost and secondly and insult to mine and I may just answer..."No as matter of fact, I'm not right and can you please tell me where I went wrong?"
Oh...one more thing, if you would rather be somewhere else than serving me, that's cool, just tell me you've lost interest and go!
I have respect for people who tell it the way it is!
Monday, August 6, 2012
Our Obsession with Winning
From a very early age most of our societal conditioning evolves around the importance of and the need to win.
For the record I have no issue with winning as I am quite a competitive person.
Many years ago though, I thought some more about the concept of "winning" and who actually benefits from it.
I discovered that whilst I enjoyed the feeling of winning there was also angst associated with the process.
It was about the same time, when I discovered that I was competing with my best mate around how much money I made and what I owned that I actually came face to face with the "dark side" of winning.
I also decided at that time that the best way for me to go forward was to learn to compete only against myself...which I have to tell you is very hard (as I have high expectations) but very peaceful.
It seems to me, that many of Australia's athletes who have medaled in the London games have done so as a result of achieving PB (personal best) times and that is an extraordinary achievement in itself...something our media outlets have missed.
So, yes, its ok to go for gold...but at the same time keep a perspective about the success of your efforts and endeavours as to how your achievements measure up against your own personal expectations and standards.
Competing against yourself has so much to recommend it and it is much more enjoyable and relevant.
For the record I have no issue with winning as I am quite a competitive person.
Many years ago though, I thought some more about the concept of "winning" and who actually benefits from it.
I discovered that whilst I enjoyed the feeling of winning there was also angst associated with the process.
It was about the same time, when I discovered that I was competing with my best mate around how much money I made and what I owned that I actually came face to face with the "dark side" of winning.
I also decided at that time that the best way for me to go forward was to learn to compete only against myself...which I have to tell you is very hard (as I have high expectations) but very peaceful.
It seems to me, that many of Australia's athletes who have medaled in the London games have done so as a result of achieving PB (personal best) times and that is an extraordinary achievement in itself...something our media outlets have missed.
So, yes, its ok to go for gold...but at the same time keep a perspective about the success of your efforts and endeavours as to how your achievements measure up against your own personal expectations and standards.
Competing against yourself has so much to recommend it and it is much more enjoyable and relevant.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Why the World Needs Coaching
Well having just completed the 3rd day of a Level 1 Executive Coaching course recently, I was struck by a couple of things which would change the world.
Yeh, I know big statement...
Fundamentally though, apart from the "cool" information that we got to play with, the most amazing part of the experience for me was the openness that all participants displayed, in relation to receiving feedback around their behaviours. There was also enormous humility people had around the concept that I am not perfect and never will be and I am here to lean and become a better person.
For anyone who has had the opportunity to play in this space of openness and acceptance it is incredibly powerful and peaceful.
I reflected that openness allows for very powerful, truthful and insightful communication to take place and from that everyone prospers.
When we are able to manifest that behaviour and mindset in all people across the globe, think of the conversations that could be had and the changes that could be made.
In my opinion, the secret to any meaningful progress and development is to cultivate an open and enquiring mind around the concept of endless possibilities and to continually care enough about someone to tell them the truth.
Coaching in part, is helping people to embrace opportunity or come to grips with their situation and to help them develop a way forward. The world needs more coaches to encourage people to be open, honest and transparent...it really is better for everybody
Yeh, I know big statement...
Fundamentally though, apart from the "cool" information that we got to play with, the most amazing part of the experience for me was the openness that all participants displayed, in relation to receiving feedback around their behaviours. There was also enormous humility people had around the concept that I am not perfect and never will be and I am here to lean and become a better person.
For anyone who has had the opportunity to play in this space of openness and acceptance it is incredibly powerful and peaceful.
I reflected that openness allows for very powerful, truthful and insightful communication to take place and from that everyone prospers.
When we are able to manifest that behaviour and mindset in all people across the globe, think of the conversations that could be had and the changes that could be made.
In my opinion, the secret to any meaningful progress and development is to cultivate an open and enquiring mind around the concept of endless possibilities and to continually care enough about someone to tell them the truth.
Coaching in part, is helping people to embrace opportunity or come to grips with their situation and to help them develop a way forward. The world needs more coaches to encourage people to be open, honest and transparent...it really is better for everybody
Monday, July 30, 2012
London Olympics
At what point do we pause and ask how much money should be spent on a sporting event.
Whilst the Olympics is an outstanding spectacle...how much money should be spent before it becomes an issue of social conscience.
Perhaps the best question might be who benefits from the event the most and the age old question of is it a worthwhile investment for the money outlayed?
Whilst the Olympics is an outstanding spectacle...how much money should be spent before it becomes an issue of social conscience.
Perhaps the best question might be who benefits from the event the most and the age old question of is it a worthwhile investment for the money outlayed?
Saturday, July 28, 2012
The Value of Common Sense
“Common Sense”
Handout An Obituary printed in the London Times........ Interesting and sadly rather true.
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.
Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
Footnote: (I believe that this article actually came from the London Times although I cannot be entirely sure so just to be clear I did not write this article nor do I claim to have)
Handout An Obituary printed in the London Times........ Interesting and sadly rather true.
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.
Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife, Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
Footnote: (I believe that this article actually came from the London Times although I cannot be entirely sure so just to be clear I did not write this article nor do I claim to have)
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